


Cluttered Memories

by gaytimetraveller



Category: Mahou Shoujo Madoka Magika | Puella Magi Madoka Magica
Genre: Angst, F/F, i am trash
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-10-17
Updated: 2014-10-17
Packaged: 2018-02-21 13:28:55
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 886
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2469935
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/gaytimetraveller/pseuds/gaytimetraveller
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sometimes Homura can't quite remember timelines in order, if she remembers them at all.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Cluttered Memories

**Author's Note:**

> im trash. im fucking trash.

3.

“Hi, my name’s Homura Akemi.”

“Madoka Kaname, nice to meet you!”

 

21.

…Perhaps I’m the fool.

 

2.

It’s exactly the same as it always is. She’s surrounded by friends, I’m alone. She’s perfectly loved, I’m simply the rejected transfer student. This time she’s still perfectly normal, she hasn’t made that deadly contract… Yet.

 

7.

I seen her at lunch today, she’s still a year older than us (well older than them, not me) and she still looks the same. She’s still smiling, not that the smile is real, not anymore.

Sometimes I wish that happiness wasn’t fake.

 

20.

Madoka wants to make a contract, I won’t let her, I’ll be strong enough for both of us. This time, I’m ready. She still wants to make a contract, even after seeing all that death, everything that comes with being a magical girl. She’s stupidly innocent, too naive. She’s a fool, but I have to save her.

 

4.

The other one, she still doesn’t trust me. It’s as if she knows, she always looks at me like I’m sort of monster. She’s never trusted me, never, not even in the beginning, when I really was a harmless transfer student. She seems to think I’m going to destroy everything. I can tell, there’s only one person she hates more than me, but they haven’t even met yet. But, you know, sometimes I think she might be right.

Am I a monster?

 

1.

I watch the life fade from her eyes, and it asks the question I know I should(n’t) answer. But I’ve already answered, I’ve already given it all up. I can only think about how everything will be so much better, about how much better everything will be, next time.

I close my eyes, and everything disappears. After a few seconds, I blink them opened again. “I hate hospitals. But it’ll be better this time, won’t it Madoka?”

She doesn’t respond, because she isn’t here, not yet.

 

24.

_Nononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononono._

**NO.**

 

5.

I killed a witch today. She was familiar, I feel like I should remember her. I should start stocking up on grief seeds, you never know when you’ll need more. I suppose I should kill a few more witches before the night is over, it’s not like I need much sleep anyway. I’ll kill at least two more tonight, minimum. Hopefully I can find a few more than that, around five would be good.

But I’m still curious about that witch. I don’t know why, but it feels like I’ve done something right in killing her.

Her name was Charlotte.

 

11.

They went to fight a witch today, I followed behind, I’d had a sinking feeling all day, I knew something was going to happen. I couldn’t save her…

Mami Tomoe died today.

 

6.

“Did I introduce you to the transfer student from yesterday?”

“No,”

“Her name is Homura Akemi, she seems nice.”

“…Something about that name sounds bad to me.”

“Come on Sayaka! She’s just a transfer student, not some kind of devil.”

 

16.

She’s getting worse and worse. I try to help her, but she only screams for me to go away.

She won’t last much longer.

 

10.

“You should make a contract too!”

“I’m not sure…”

“How about one more practice run, with Mami?”

“Yeah, but I’m not sure what to wish for.”

“Why not wish for a party, or maybe a big cake?”

 

8.

I saw them fighting a witch today. Sometimes I wish I could be with them, fighting together like that. Maybe I should go join up with _her_.

I think she’s going to make a contract soon too, the others probably convinced her. I don’t really care, she doesn’t really matter.

As long as Madoka’s safe.

 

13.

I seen her today, she’s also still the same. Still angry, still hotheaded, the same as ever. I talked to her, we decided to fight together. I know she doesn’t trust me, it’s funny how similar they are, even if they always feud.

How long will this fragile alliance last?

 

23.

She’s coming tomorrow, am I ready? Will I die? Do I deserve it?

 

12.

Do they regret it yet? After seeing how magical girls die so easily, are they rethinking their decisions?

Well her at least, Madoka is still safe.

 

25.

Madoka Kaname made a contract today.

Madoka Kaname fell into despair today.

Madoka Kaname died today.

 

15.

She’s spiralling down again, everything is starting to crumble. It’s all tumbling, crumbling, falling apart. She’s plummeting into despair, how long will it take?

 

18.

We fought a witch today. I managed to save Madoka, but she was close, too close. But the other, she didn’t make it. I couldn’t save her, I knew that she was going to die today, and that I could do nothing.

Sayaka Miki died today.

 

9.

Sayaka made a contract today.

I wonder how long she’ll last this time?

 

14.

They met today.

They fought today.

She almost died today.

We all made it out alive.

Madoka is still safe.

 

19.

It’s only us left, can I defeat _her_ on my own?

 

22.

Am I a monster? Do I deserve to live?

 

17.

Kyoko Sakura turned into a witch today.

Sayaka Miki wants to save her.

 

26.

It’s all over.

 

0.

“The contract is complete.”

 

**-RESET-**


End file.
